Harry Potter and the Evil Book
by Jade and Youkai
Summary: Harry Potter discovers that Tom Riddle has moved from the book to the laptop. Strange things follow in occurance to that...what will happen next? Warning: mild slash and this story has a weird plot that doesn't even exist.
1. The First Encounter

Harry Potter and the Evil Book (a.k.a. the laptop)  
  
Rated: PG :)

  
Chapter 1. The First Encounter.

  
Harry Potter: Hi my name is Harry Potter. XP (fades  
away)  
The Evil Book: Hi, I am Tom Riddle. (fades away)  
Harry Potter: I thought u were in a book, how did u  
get onto the laptop? (fades away)  
The Evil Book: Oh...Didn't realize that. Maybe cuz I'm  
Lord Voldemort. Oops!!!]  
Harry Potter: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! I'm not  
screaming cuz ur Lord Voldemort. I'm  
screaming cuz u moved to the laptop. (fades away)  
The Evil Book: o...k... anyway, die Harry  
potter!!! Come here u stupid basilisk!! (fades away)  
Harry Potter: Oh yeah? I have Barney on my side!!!   
He's more powerful than that stupid basilisk  
thingamabob. XP (fades away)  
The Evil Book: Errr... Ur stoopid. (trying to change  
the subject,) so, who do u like? Hermione Granger?  
(fades away)  
Harry Potter: No u stoopid idiot, I like Ron. (fades  
away)  
Th3 3vil Book: (acting like Hermione) ur sooo  
stupid. I meant which GIRL do u like? (fades away)  
Harry Potter: I'm gay now!!! I gave up on Cho  
Chang. Girls are too hard to get. Boy's r easier. (fades  
away)  
Th3 3vil Book: I, Tom Riddle, shall now end this  
conversation, with a poof! (POOF!!!!) (fades away)  
  
Harry Potter: Mmm...peanut butter... (fades away) *closes  
book and goes off to find a jar of peanut butter to  
rub all over Ron's face)  
THE END

Read the next chapter to explain this weird one. REVIEW, and please...no flames...we know it's hard to understand but it will be explained in the next chap. :D

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Author's note: Harry Potter was Jade(from Jackie Chan, the grown up version of her)  
And The Evil book was Legolas/Inu  
Yasha(one person)  
  
Jade: I doubt whether Harry Potter was really gay...but  
u have to wonder...he's TOO close to Ron.  
  
Legolas/Inuyasha: Oh just shut up and stop being all  
weirdo and stuff. Bai ppls!!! :)

We'll be writing the next chapter shortly, so bear with us.


	2. The Truth

Ch 2. The Truth.  
  
-After Harry finished what he did with the peanut  
butter, he told Ron and Hermione what had happened  
with the laptop. "U told him that u were gay and that  
ur partner was Ron?!" Hermione exclaimed, "I thought  
u were going out with Cho Chang." -  
-"I am." -  
-"Then why did u tell him that?" -  
-"I was in a hyper mood." -  
  
Excuse me, but the authors would like to add their  
commentary to the story:  
Jade: What's wrong with Ron?  
Leggie/Inu: I dunno... maybe he's "stunned" by Harry's  
response to the laptop..."  
  
-"No he isn't" Harry replied to the commentary, "Ur  
not stunned r u Ron?" -  
-"Ehhrrrrrrrr....." Ron mumbled as he drooled with  
nothingness in his eyes string of into space. -  
  
Jade: I think he likes u Harry.  
Leggie/Inu: yea, maybe he's staring at you with  
admiration  
Jade: I can see the new Harry Potter book...Harry  
Potter and his new girlfriend...oops...I mean  
boyfriend.  
Leggie/Inu: Yea, I know, isn't it wonderful? Harry has  
his dream boyfriend....  
  
-"Shut up." growled Harry. Ron was all red mainly  
because of the "boyfriend" comments. Ron all of the  
sudden exclaimed, "No, I like Hermione." -  
-"What!!!!" exclaimed Hermione, "U know I like Viktor!! -  
-"Huh????" said Ron, "But I Like you!!!" -  
  
Jade: Oooh...love triangle...  
Leggie/Inu: I know... Young love is wunderful isn't it?  
especially when two guys like one girl.....  
  
-Ron looked as if he was gonna kill the  
commentary...Harry was laughing like a maniac when he  
expressed Voldemort's thoughts and rolling on the  
floor. Needless to say...he accidentally rolled down  
the stairs. Hermione had...well...fainted... -  
  
-"Ron, (laugh) will you (laugh) help me (laugh) down  
here (laugh) please?!!" Harry said in a hysterical  
laughing voice. -  
-Just as Ron was walking down the stairs... -  
  
Jade: I wonder whether Gandalf went to Hogwarts?  
Leggie/Inu: You're an idiot Jade...Gandalf is from a  
completely different story u freak!  
Jade: It's not my fault!!! After Harry told the evil  
laptop...or book...that he was gay, anything's  
possible.  
  
-"Harry, do you think Hermione likes me?" -  
-"No, she likes Viktor..." -  
-"I know this sounds crazy, but do YOU like me?" -  
-"......................................." -  
  
Jade: *cough* *cough* no *cough* *cough* he's going out  
with Cho *cough* *cough*  
Leggie/Inu: I know, but what if Harry IS really gay?  
Jade: Then the world is doomed idiot...no one would  
want to read a story about a wizard boy with a  
scar on his head, who survived from Lord  
Voldemort when he was a baby that, that turned  
gay all of the sudden?!  
  
-"Errm, Ron? Did I just hear wut I thought I just  
heard?" -  
-"Errr, yea u just did..." -  
-"Uuummmmmmm, Ron, you just read my mind..." -  
  
Jade: Are u two ignoring us?!!!!  
  
-"Err, no, it's just that u guys are annoying us..." -  
  
Jade: That's the job of the commentary idiots!!! Or  
did u not read Blade and Skye's story Truth or  
Dare?  
  
-"Yea right, wutever..." -  
-"Anyway, Harry, so DO you like me?" -  
-"As a friend yea..." -  
-"No, I mean, LIKE LIKE me..." -  
  
Jade: Excuse me...I need to go puke.  
Leggie/Inu: yo tambien... (me too)  
  
-Jade and Leggie/Inu run into the girl's  
bathroom...minutes later there is the beautiful sound  
of two people puking. -  
  
Jade: Beautiful sound?  
  
-"UUUmmmm, Ron, I think I am gay... cuz I think I do  
like you..." -  
-"What about Cho?" -  
-"Ooohhhh, I think I'll just dump her..." -  
-Jade all of the sudden appears in disgust and  
performs Kung Fu on both Harry and Ron. Both go  
unconscious.-  
  
Jade: That's that.  
Leggie/Inu: (coming out with a green face) did I miss  
anything....?  
  
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See our next chapter and find out what happens with this new couple...and  
see whether their is more talking with the evil book a.k.a. laptop. We're going to write the next chapter over e-mail...so it might take a while. Please bear with us. BIBI!! REVIEW (and no please flames)!!!!


	3. Disgusting Revelations

Ch. 3 Disgusting Revelations.

- A couple weeks later -

-"Ron..." -

-"Yes Harry?" -

-"I was wondering whether..." -

-"Yes.." -

Jade and Leggie/Inu: That u want to break up with him?

- Jade and Leggie/Inu all of the sudden appeared out of nowhere. -

- "Why are u two here?" Harry asked. -

Jade: To bother u.

Leggie/Inu: Duh?

-"Shoot!" Harry thought. -

-"Really Harry, u want to break up with me?" Ron asked. -

-"Yeah...Ron is that ok?"-

-"Sure."-

-"Really?"-

-"Really."

-"Why might I ask?" -

-"Harry...I like someone else now."-

-"Wow, same here."-

-"So that's it right?"-

-"Yeah."-

-So, Harry and Ron broke up...later that day, Harry talked with the evil book. -

-Harry: "Uhhmm, Evil Book?" -

-The Evil Book: "Wat." the Evil Book said in an annoying voice. -

-Harry: (quotes from Pirates of the Caribbean) "I apologize for seeming so forward, must I

must speak my mind. I wish to acquire a marriage to a fine woma- I mean book."

-The Evil Book: "And what does this have to do with me!?" -

-Harry: "I love you........" -

-The Evil Book: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" -

-Harry starts to chase the Evil Book around the Great Hall, while kissing the air, making it obvious that he wanted to smooch the Evil Book. (Romantic music starts playing in the background ^.^) -

-The Evil Book: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" -

-Harry: I looooooooooove you!" in a sing-song voice -

-Finally, he caught the Evil Book and started to smooch it with slobbery kisses. (ewww) -

-Meanwhile in the Gryffindor common room-

-"What's that?"-

Leggie/Inu: None of your business Ron.

-" I want to know."-

Jade: We're doing Geometry. We're studying for a Geometry test.

-"What's geometry?"

Leggie/Inu: None of your business.

-"I want to know."-

Jade: Something.

-"Pleeeeeeeeeeease?"

-Both Leggie/Inu and Jade threw their geometry notebooks at Ron, but Ron dodged it. He then picked up the geometry books and started reading them.-

-"What's this a2 + b2 = c2? Alphabet soup?"-

Jade: No, Pythagorean Theorem.

-"What's that?"

Leggie/Inu: Your butt.

-"Really?"-

Leggie/Inu: No you idiot.

-"Will u tell me what it is?"-

-Both Leggie/Inu and Jade threw their geometry textbooks at Ron, and this time, both textbooks didn't miss. Ron got knocked out cold.-

-Then Harry came in hugging the laptop."

-What's that Harry?" Hermione inquired.-

Jade: The Evil Book.

-The Evil Book: "Ewwwwww.... Blehh, gross!" -

-Harry: "My dream come true...." dazed off in the process of you know what.-

Leggie/Inu: Ewwww.....GROSS!!!!

Jade: That's just nassteey...u REALLY need to find better partners Harry.

-Harry: "How about Draco Malfoy?:" -

Jade and Leggie/Inu: "AHHHHH!!! THAT'S EVEN WORSE!!!!!!!"

Jade: Actually...it is sort of better and funny at the same time...

-Later-

-"What are u two doing?" Harry asked staring at Jade and Leggie/Inu.-

Jade & Leggie/Inu: What?

-Jade and Leggie/Inu eyes dart back and forth.-

-"You're taking notes on everything we say."

Leggie/Inu: No we're not.

-"Then why are u writing on that notebook everytime we say something as well as crowd over it too?"-

Leggie/Inu: What notebook?

-Leggie/Inu hides the notebook behind Jade's back.-

-"Let me see it."-

-Harry reached out to grab the notebook behind Jade's back.-

Jade: No.

-"I'll take it then."

Jade: No, u won't.

-Jade further hid it behind her back.-

-"Why?"-

Jade: I know kung fu and I can knock u out cold.

-"Fair enough."-

-Harry withdrew from trying to grab the notebook. Jade sighed, but still didn't take out the notebook.-

-Later that day -

-Draco Malfoy's evil conscience whispered "Draco......" -

-Draco exclaimed "What!! Who's there?!" frantically looking around. -

-Draco Malfoy's evil conscience aka JASON TOY said "your conscience...." -

-Draco said "Oh...what do you want?!" -

-JASON TOY replied "It's time for you to ask Harry Potter out on a date." -

-Draco screamed, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" -

~to be continued~

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What will happen between Draco and Harry? What chemistry shall happen? Why is Draco Malfoy's evil conscience JASON TOY? Who is JASON TOY in real life? Find out in the 4th Chapter: A New Relationship. This chapter will be written as soon as possible...


	4. A New Relationship

Ch.4 A New Relationship

Disclaimer:

Leggie/Inu: I'm tired of my name… I'm changing my name… Hmmm… I think my new name'll be…………………………………………………….. I know! Ummm, Youkai… ok… yea….

Jade: At least I don't change MY name *sticks tongue out*

Leggie/Inu (now Youkai): I changed my name cuz it's too long u weirdo!

-The next day-

-"Why hello POTter..." Malfoy said with a malicious smile.-

-"What do U want?!" Harry demanded. -

-The smile Malfoy wore was quickly wiped off his face, "I...I wanted to ask u out on a date." -

-"WHAT?!" -

-"Is there anything wrong with that POTter?"

-"No...it's just that I also wanted to ask u out..." -

-"So what's the answer?" -

-"Yes."-

-"GO DRACO!!!" JASON TOY a.k.a. Malfoy's evil conscience screamed. -

Jade and Youkai: Jason? What are u doing in here?

-"I was going to ask u the same question, Samantha and Grace." Jason replied.

-"What?!" Harry exclaimed, "Your real names are Samantha and Grace?!"

Jade: No...

Youkai: Just phony nickname...

Jade and Youkai whisper to Jason: Shut up Jason.

-"Soooooo...who do u have a crush on Jade?" Jason asked suddenly with a sinister smile on his face." -

Jade: I'm not telling u!!!

-"Darn...u still won't tell me after I've been begging u over e-mail?"-

-"What's e-mail?" Malfoy asked suddenly. -

Jade and Youkai" None of ur business.

-"Will u pleeeeeeeeeease tell me who u like Jade?" Jason begged. -

Jade: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"What a minute..." Harry interrupted, "How IN THE WORLD do u three know each other?"-

Jade: He goes to our school...he's in my core class.

Youkai: And he still won't shut up about how I'm faster than him in Geometry.

-Ron suddenly appeared out of nowhere, "What's Geometry?" -

Jade and Youkai: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"Awwwww, come on… It can't hurt to just tell what this Gee-aaww-meh-tree thing is…" -

Jade: Yes it does…I mean we have to do sixty geometry problems at night.

Youkai: Doesn't that sound like fun?

-"It is fun?" Ron inquired.

Youkai: *rolls eyes* of course not u idiot!  I was being sarcastic!

-"Oh…………………………."

Jason: I know what geometry is……….

Youkai: Ooh… he has an evil grin on his face… Hey, Wait! You better shut up Jason!

Jason: Hee-Hee… Geometry is…. Your face! *laugh* times 5

Jade: *ROLLS EYES* OOH… my… God… You're sooo stupid Jason!

Jason: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jade and Youkai: …………………………………………………….

-"I feel so unloved." Harry all of the sudden exclaimed. -

Jade, Youkai, and Jason: Why?

-"Cause u guys are ignoring us."

Malfoy screamed, "US?  THERE IS NO US!!!!!!!!!!!!  ONLY U!!!!!!!!!!!" -

Harry screamed back, "FINE THEN!  LET'S BREAK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" -

Jade: But………….

Youkai: U guys have only been together…….

Jason: for 5 seconds.

-"So what?!" Malfoy exclaimed, "Let's go Jason…wait…Jason?  Where are u?"-

Jade: Jason?

Youkai: Wonder where he went?

Jade: Maybe he got eaten by a balrog….

Youkai: Let's hope that that happened………it's way better than being Malfoy's evil conscience.

-Malfoy glared at them. –

                     ~to be continued~

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Where is Jason?  Well…that's all we can say for the next chapter……BIBI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	5. The Ending and Beginning Revelation

Ch. 5 The Ending and Beginning Revelation

-Harry, Malfoy, Jade, and Youkai decided to go search for Jason, wherever the stupid idiot may have ran off to. Ron decided not to come along because he wanted to check out every book in Hogwarts' library that stated something about geometry. -

- Harry, Malfoy, Jade and Youkai decided to split up...Jade and Youkai went one way, while Harry and Malfoy went another (mainly because Jade and Youkai could not stand being in a group with Harry and Mafloy)...-

Jade: I mean who would want to be with a person who fell in love with a book and another person who continuously asked u about what geometry is?

Youkai: Well...we rather be with each other than those two losers...

-All of the sudden in the distance there was a faint sound...-

Youkai: What was that?

Jade: Nothing...just someone saying "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" in the distance.

Youkai: Then why is it getting louder?

Jade: Cuz the person who's screaming is coming closer idiot!

-All of the sudden Jason ran past them screaming with a ox thingy engulfed in flames chasing him in pursuit. -

Jason: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Youkai: So he is being chased by a balrog.

Jade: Umm Youkai? Shouldn't we go help him?

Youkai: I didn't know there were balrogs in Harry Potter *lost in thought*...

Jade: YOUKAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Youkai: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh...it's just you Jade...what?

Jade: I SAID SHOULDN"T WE GO HELP HIM U IDIOT...U DISGRACE TO HUMAN NATURE!!!!!!!!!!!

Youkai: If u don't mind...I'm so much smarter than u.

Jade: Prove it.

Youkai: Fine...umm...can u give me an example?

Jade: *rolls eyes*

Youkai: You're so mean!!!!!!

-Jade and Youkai continued to argue off in the distance. Needless to say, Jade, who just happened to have the dragon talisman (if u don't know what that is, it gives u the power of combustion), nearly burned Youkai's head off with it. Meanwhile, the balrog was chasing Jason to the place where Harry and Malfoy were searching. –

Jade: Wait a minute…it's running towards Harry and Malfoy?

Youkai: Shoot…they've never seen a balrog before and don't know how to handle it…

Jade: WELL…we don't either…

Youkai: We'll just stand in front of it and say "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!!"

Jade: *rolls eyes* Sure…prove to me that that'll work…

Youkai: Can and will…

-Jade and Youkai ran off after the balrog.  Meanwhile, Harry saw something in the distance. –

-"What's that fiery thing in the distance?" Harry asked –

- "What's that in the distance?" Harry asked –

- "Dunno…" Malfoy replied without even looking at it, "Did u hear someone screaming?" -

- "Yeah…wonder who that is…" Harry wondered. -

Youkai: Everyone get out of the way!

- "What?" Harry asked, "Why?" -

Jade: Get out of the way or else I will perform kung fu on u.

- "Fine." Harry and Malfoy said together and both ran into a classroom.  Jason all of the sudden ran pass Jade and Youkai into the same classroom Harry and Malfoy ran into.  Then Jade and Youkai were face to face with a balrog. -

Youkai: YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 - The balrog snorted -

Youkai: It's not working!

Jade: Duh?

Youkai: OH!  U have a better idea?

Jade: Yeah…

-Jade took the dragon talisman and burned the balrog's head off. –

Youkai: How did u aim so precisely?

-Jade grinned. –

Jade: I pretended the balrog was u.

- Jade and an insulted Youkai ran into the classroom Harry, Malfoy, and Jason were in.  Jason was running around like a maniac. -

-Jason all of the sudden ran smack into Harry and they both fell towards the ground, Jason on top of Harry. Romantic music started playing in the background. -

Youkai: Why is there romantic music in the background?

Jade: Hey director! You're playing the romantic music at the wrong time! You're supposed to play it when Harry falls in love! This apparently isn't the right time!

Youkai: Yeah, who would fall in love with Jason?

-Jason glared at them. Immediately after that both Harry and Jason puked, the romantic music turned off. -

- Harry looked at Jade and Youkai after puking.  "What was that thing?" he asked. -

Jade: A balrog.

-"But I thought they only existed in Middle Earth." –

Youkai: Apparently…it's a strange world isn't it?

-"It's time to go now Jason." Malfoy said with the usual sneer in his voice. –

Jason: I DON'T WANT TO BE UR EVIL CONSCIENCE ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"Why?" Mafloy asked.  Malfoy then broke down into tears. –

Jade: Quit it Mafloy.  That's disgusting.

Youkai: We all know ur faking it.

- Malfoy stopped "fake" crying. -

Jason: Because ur not evil and weird enough for me to become ur evil conscience.

- "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Malfoy screamed.  What would his dad say if he knew he lost his evil conscience to…to who?  Who did Jason now what to be the evil conscience of?

Jason: How bout I'll be ur evil conscience Harry?

-No Malfoy thought…anybody but Harry…please don't say yes Harry... -

-"No…" Harry said firmly, "I don't want to have an evil conscience."

Jason: How bout Jade or Youkai's

Jade: Over…my…dead…body.

-Jade looked as if she wanted to burn Jason's head off…which everyone was hoping she would do if murdering was not against the law. –

Youkai: We're the commentary…we're not SUPPOSE to have evil consciences.

Jason: How bout Ron?  Hermione?  Cho?  Dumbledore?

Youkai: Did u know Dumbledore is bumblebee in old English?

Jade: *sigh* We're so getting off topic.  Jason…why don't u go back home and become normal Jason Toy.  Don't be anyone's evil conscience.  Ur totally irrelevant to this story.  Besides, ur a horrible evil conscience and ur making the story go off topic.

Jason: What's the plot to this story anyway?

Youkai: "Hint hint": note the title: Harry Potter and the Evil Book.  It's about what happens with Harry and the Evil Book.

Jade: And about Harry finding the perfect partner.  By the looks of things…ur not on his next "fall in love with" list.

Jason: Fine then.

-Jason then, sulking, disappeared and then reappeared inside his house.  He then started doing geometry homework… -

-"Wait!" Ron screamed, "What's geometry?!" -

Jade: *sigh*

Youkai: *giggle*

-Harry all of the sudden saw Cho.  He felt himself grow hot and realized he still loved Cho. –

Youkai: Wait!  If u go out with her, then everything will go back to normal!

Jade: *raises an eyebrow* I don't know…will it?

Youkai: What do u mean?

Jade: Well…there's still the evil book and all.

Youkai: Oh yeah.

Jade: Come on…let's go arrange something with the evil book.

-Jade and Youkai then walked off to where the evil book was. –

-Harry walked up to Cho. –

-"Hey Cho!" Harry called. –

-"Oh…hi Harry." Cho replied. –

-"Will u marry me?  Oops…wrong question.  Will u go out with me?" Harry asked. –

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Cliffhangers are fun…anyway…what are Jade and Youkai planning to do?  Will Cho say yes to Harry's question?  Will Ron ever find out what geometry is (unlikely)?  Read the sixth chapter and find out!  ^.^


	6. The Sun is a Mass of Incandescent Gas an...

Ch. 6 The Sun is a Mass of Incandescent Gas and much much more.

Disclaimer:

Jade: Since we forgot to add this in the first five chapters...here it is:

Youkai: We do not own any of the Harry Potter characters....we're just using them for our story. Why do I have to say that?

Jade: Because we did rock, paper, scissors and you lost.

Youkai: Oh yeah?

-Jade and Youkai argue off into the distance. -

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

-"U mean u want to get back together?" Cho asked "What happened during the time u broke up with me?"

-"Umm...good question...umm...." Harry replied not wanting to say.

-"Ok..." Cho looked at him strangely, "Yes then...I will go out with u."

-The next day-

-"Harry Potter!" -

- Harry lifted his head hearing his name called. Professor McGonagall strode in. -

-"Profesor Dumbledore would like to have a few words with u." -

Youkai: We would like to add in a fun fact...even though we're not in this scene.

Jade: Did u know Dumbledore is the Old English word for bumblebee? Anyway, back to the story...sorry for interupting...

-Harry stood there in Professor Dumbledore's office. Dumbledore faced him, there was a long strange silence (the type of silence that has no purpose at all), and then Dumbledore spoke. -

-"Harry...have u been talking to a laptop lately? -

-"No." Harry lied thinking about what happened with him and the laptop (see ch. 3). -

-"Good...because I swear I saw u hugging and kissing one the other day." -

-"Is that all u wanted to ask me?" -

-"Yes." -

-As Harry walked out of Dumbledore's office, he saw Cho. "Hey there." he said. -

-"Hey." -

-All of sudden Harry and Cho were kissing. Then there was a camera flash, but they didn't notice. Harry later talked with the Evil Book about it. -

Harry: Evil Book?

The Evil Book: Oh...Harry...I have something to show u.

-The Evil Book went onto google images and typed in harry and cho. All of the sudden pictures of Harry and Cho kissing were all over the web.

Harry: What? WHO DID THIS?!

The Evil Book: I'm not telling u!!!!!!!! But...u now have tons of angry fangirls waiting to kill u.

Harry: Oh no...

The Evil Book: And it's gets better! Now I will sing this song and I won't stop till u leave! Finally! Payback for kissing me!

-All of the sudden a really corny sun song started to play. -

The Evil Book:

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas,

A gigantic nuclear furnace!

Where hydrogen is built into helium,

At a temperature of millions of degrees!

Yo ho its hot!

The sun is not,

A place where we could live!!!!!

But here on Earth there be no life,

Without the light it gives!

We need its light,

We need its heat,

We need its energy!!!

Without the sun without a doubt!

There be no u and me!!!!!!!!!

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas,

A gigantic nuclear furnace!

Where hydrogen is built into helium,

At a temperature of millions of degrees!

The sun is hot...It is so hot that everything on it is a gas, hydrogen, helium, and many other metals.

The sun is large...If the sun were hollow, a million Earths could fit inside! And yet the sun is only a middle sized star.

The sun is far away...About 93 million miles away, and that's why it looks so small.

And even when its out of sight,

The sun shines night and day!!!!!!

The sun gives heat,

The sun gives light,

The sunlight that we see,

The sunlight comes from our own sun's,

Atomic energy! Scientists have found that the sun is a huge atom smashing machine.

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas,

A gigantic nuclear furnace!

Where hydrogen is built into helium,

At a temperature of millions of degrees!

-The Evil Book continued singing the corny song over and over again until Harry was sick of it, memorized all the words, and had it stuck in his head FOREVER. Harry now had an idea of who was behind all this. -

-"Ok...Jade and Youkai...ur dead." Harry said once he got back to the dormitory.

Jade and Youkai: What did we do?

-"U took a picture of Cho and I kissing, posted it online, and told the evil book to sing that stupid sun song." -

-Jade and Youkai smiled. -

Jade: Took u long enough.

Youkai: We were just trying to make the story more interesting, and drive u insane.

Jade: So for the rest of the story, you'll have a ton of angry fangirls to deal with...

Youkai: And the sun song stuck in ur head.

-"ARRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Harry lounged at them, missed (terribly), and ended jumping out the window. Hermione, who was luckily there, managed to save him before he hit the ground and levitate him back up. Needless to say, many professors who happened to look out of their office windows were puzzled to see Harry Potter fall past their window. -

- "Sheesh Harry," Hermione said, "You have really bad aim." Hermione stared at the window which was right across the room from Jade and Youkai. "Reparo!" Hermione said, and the window was back together. "Now I'm going to go visit Ron in the library and tell him that there is no way he's going to find a book on Geometry there." With that, Hermione left leaving Jade and Youkai shaking their heads and Harry looking out the window which he crashed through.

Jade: To think Ron still tries.

Youkai: Yeah...what an idiot.

-Hermione all of the sudden rushed in. "Has anyone seen Ron? I can't find him at the library and I searched the whole school and still can't find him!"

Jade: We might know where he is.

-At Jason Toy's house.-

Jason: FOR THE LAST TIME I WILL NOT TELL U WHAT GEOMETRY IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!!" Ron pleaded on the floor begging on bending knees. Jason banged his head against the table. -

-"Interesting..............." Hermione said looking quite dazed. -

Jade: Good...at least he bothering Jason and not us.

-"When will he be back?" Harry, who apparently had finally come to his senses after jumping out the window inquired. Soon after he began humming the sun song. -

Jade and Youkai: Who cares?

-All of the sudden Voldermort appeared out of nowhere. -

Jade: How did he get in here?

-"How did I get here?" Voldermort asked. -

Youkai: Not the brightest crayon in the box now are you Voldermort?

-"You dare say my name! But all wizards fear it!" -

Jade and Youkai: We're not wizards.

-"Oh..." Voldermort looked around the room and his eyes landed on Harry, who was humming the sun song. "I will kill you today Harry Potter!" -

Jade: Well...I guess if he dies then there's no point in staying do we'll just leave.

Youkai: Have fun in the afterlife Harry!

-Jade picked up her Geometry book and Voldermort's eyes landed on it. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed and then melted into a puddle of nothing. -

Jade: Whoa...*stares at Geometry book*

Youkai: I knew Geometry was evil....but it's not that powerful is it?

-Ron walked into the room. "Is that what Geometry is for?" he asked. -

Jade and Youkai: No.

-"Shoot." -

-Harry, who was upset because he didn't get to kill Voldermort threw himself out the same window and died. But most of us know that the main reason he did that was because he was trying to get the sun song out of his head. Ron threw himself out the window too out of grief that he could never discover what Geometry is. Hermione threw herself out the window because she didn't want to be stuck with Jade and Youkai alone. Jade and Youkai watched them fall.-

Jade: Youkai...I think we should end the story...

Youkai: BUT IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jade: I know...but everyones...umm...not here anymore.

Youkai: BUT WE NEVER GOT TO SEE HARRY SUFFER LONG ENOUGH BECAUSE OF OUR BRILLIANT PLAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jade: I wanted to see him suffer too....but he's now....umm....not currently here....so we're gonna have to end it.

Youkai: All right....

-Jade and Youkai disappear while Dumbledore rushed to do CPR on Harry, Hermione, and Ron. -

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

This is the end. *Jade and Youkai bow*

Jade: If you didn't like the ending...we're sorry cuz we didn't exactly know how to end it...and so we chose this.

Youkai: Let's just say the stories over, so for all you people patiently waiting for the ending (and the sixth chapter which took a long time cuz of homework and all) here it is.

Jade: We will leave you with this final statement: CHICKENS GO CLUCK CLUCK, COWS GO MOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Youkai: Is anyone gonna say review and no flames please?

Jason: OOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jade: You can't, ur not an author.

Jason: Darn...*walks off*

Jade: I'll say it then....REVIEW AND NO FLAMES PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Youkai: What was the whole point of the chickens and cows thing?

Jade: It had no point.

Youkai: Then why did you say it?

Jade: There is something in the world called randomness. Do you know that.

Youkai: I SO DO!!!!!!!!!!

*Jade and Youkai AGAIN argue into the distance.*


End file.
